Goodbye by Beatriz Rosa
- Apr 17, 2024
- 2 min read
I can't hear my head/because my heart is screaming like the /blood he’s supposed to spit into my /veins got caught in his throat/ like it tastes real good/like copper charms/choking him out/ telling my friends on the other side to go/ when all I want to do is/fly to them/ loneliness don't describe this delayed/ pulse everytime I pass the hospital /like/M___/ J___/N___/is the beginning of a prayer/ of a pagan religion/ founded by a great lake/like I want someone/ to hold me/to kiss my cheek a million times /like my friends did/ like I want them to/ wrap me in a blanket/leave me/in a mountain to starve/if it means no more of them will die like/ this / may very well be/a suicide note I've nursed for 5 years/ a sacrifice to all of mortality/I can’t hear my head /cause my metaphors no longer scare me/ like I’ve become predictable/ I don’t know where else to run/ T___/Z___/S___/ are broken pieces of an incantation I had once memorized/like this cold breeze holds dead laughter/ and I’ve never heard the lake yell at me before/ but here it is holding me/ like I’ve always begged/ like I’ve always sang/ it sounds like “ please don’t follow me here”/ like “let me rest”/ like “We’re gonna make brownies before Satan shows me to my room”/I know I promised/Papas I know I promised I would pull seasalt taffy from my chest/ but it was just too hard/ maybe it can thaw out if I/ roll it in this blunt/ with leaves I didn’t question/have you ever held a piece of candy/ near a flame/ to mourn someone?
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